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HASH TRASH. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not.

WARNING: consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like an asshole.

WARNING: consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone them at 4 in the morning.

WARNING: consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell happened to your pants.

WARNING: consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing WITH you.

WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may actually CAUSE pregnancy.

And we have the following contribution from Graham Owen who figures that there are more than enough good jokes in Sydney to toss one or two like the following out to the Jaapies.

Irish Adrenalin Sports

Two Irishmen walk into a pet shop and go straight over to the bird section. Gerry says to Paddy, "Dat's dem".
The assistant comes over and asks if he can help them. "Yeah, we'll take four of dem dere birds in dat cage op dere" says Gerry, "Put dem in a peeper bag."
The assistant does and the two men pay for the birds and leave. They get into Gerry's van and drive until they are high up in the hills and stop at the top of a cliff with a 500-foot drop
. "Dis looks loike a grand place, eh?" says Gerry. "Oh, yeh, dis looks good," replies Paddy. They flip a coin and Gerry wins the toss. "I guess I git to go first, eh Paddy?" says Gerry.
He then takes two birds out of the bag, places them on his shoulders and jumps off the cliff. Paddy watches as Gerry drops off the edge and goes straight down for a few seconds followed by a 'SPLAT'. As Paddy looks over the edge of the cliff he shakes his head and says, "Fock dat, dis budgie jumpin' is too fockin' dangerous for me".

Run 913 - Boet Screws Up - AGAIN

Presumably plotting to get kicked off the hareline altogether and forever, Boet set a horrendous run which will be as much remembered for aimless follow-the-haring as his previous run was for the headless-chicken "how do I get outa here" debacle. Attempts to cross the Gateway construction site were thwarted by fences and cliffs and it was only the fitter and more able minority (RearEnd, Slumpy and Calamari) who made it past the security guards and across the intended territory.

Determined to compensate with exciting narrative for the lack of an actual trail, our hare insisted on regaling his captive audience (remember there was no actual trail to pretend you were looking for) with mind-numbing detail about the technology involved in casting walls on the ground and then tipping them up into position. It was apparently more expensive than traditional methods, took longer and cost a lot more. Apparently that's a good thing.

Shortly after this the pack seemed to disintegrate when it became clear that Boet was intending to recite these exciting engineering stories for of each of a large number of buildings appearing through the evening gloom. And the welcome appearance of Louis's bakkie (Hey, I was gonna run - look there's my takkies in the back!) meant for some a quick end to the run that never really got to be.

Boet and sausages have never been a good mix - who'll ever forget those bright red and odd smelling little chile sausages that he got really cheap from a halal butcher in Sparks Road. When Steve "The Bike" had to cancel a flight to England the next day due to the unreliable condition of his anal sphincter and more than one semi-comatose hasher thought he'd puked up his ringpiece before dawn. Again, I say, "Boet and sausages - bad mix!" The fact that nobody seems to have been poisoned this time around may change all that. Tasty dead pig sausages on a windy night with that awesome view of the beachfront. Nearly enough to make one almost forget the run.

4-6 Jun `99	Interhash Africa `99	Victoria Falls, Zimbabwe
21 Aug `99	Durban H3 1450th
25 Feb `00	Interhash 2000	Hobart, Australia

The RECEDING HARELINE

Scribes are required to deliver their munning cissives to:
18a Canford Park, 53 Anthony Road, Umgeni Park
by Thursday, 9:00 am. latest.(tel: 838-344 or fax: 844-928)
YOU SCRIBE THE WEEK BEFORE YOU SET !

DATE	    RUN   HARE SETTING	    TEL: work   FAX        TEL: home
16-Mar-98   909   Roland Pepper     830-873     830-873    830-873 
23-Mar-99   910   John Becker       207-3340    207-3110   840-975
30-Mar-99   911   John Powell       846-720     846-720    846-720
06-Apr-99   912   John Tiernan      701-2311    701-8849   562-9543
13-Apr-99   913   Jim Harte 
20-Apr-99   914   Paul Lewis        202-6961    202-6203   764-0239
27-Apr-99   915   Kevan Hunt        907-7111    562-9341   523-992
04-May-99   916   Bob Bishop        847-309     847-309    847-309
11-May-99   917   Louis Rodrigues   500-4790    500-4370   831-694
18-May-99   918   James Dixon       202-6464    202-8220   838-116
25-May-99   919   Greg Bishop       847-309     847-309    523-153

CATERING SUGGESTIONS: Which are based on a pack of up to twenty ( 20 )

Hot day: 24 cokes Cool day: 12 cokes
1 case Windhoek Lager (a more and more popular choice)
1 case Windhoek Export
1 case Windhoek Lite (for those with themselves to bluff)
1 case mix-'n-match (Amstel, Hansa, Castle, Bavaria, Ohlssen)
Run & first drink - R 5.00 Subsequents - R 3.00 each. (Or R10,00 for the first 3)